 |
| a view of my small neighborhood, just a tiny fragment of this city |
I want to share a moment that I've lived recently.
Back in December (my first Christmas away from my family) I was downtown with some friends on the 24th. We were giving shoes and food to many people living on the streets. My heart really hurt not just seeing all the homeless people, but seeing the business-like way and mindset of many people serving.
To a small boy: "Here try these shoes on. What, they don't fit? I'm sorry it's all we have. Move along. Oh wait, smile for a picture so we can show our sponsors. Ok, next!"
I understand we had to be efficient with the time & resources we had to give, but I couldn't help but think that Jesus would not have done it that way.
I stopped to pick up a sweet five year old darling with messy long hair. She was shy and quiet but held onto me tightly as I held her in my arms. A volunteer approached me and asked, "Why are you holding her? She could have lice." That made me angry.
Then we left. We had to go back to my friend's house to prepare Christmas Eve dinner and celebrate with her family. I was quiet on the car ride home and couldn't stop thinking about all those kids with dirty, depressed looking faces. Wearing short sleeves and no shoes in December, who knows how few of them have parents or not. I understand there are poor homeless people and orphans all over the world. I believe there will always be people in these situations. Our world is fallen and won't be remade until Jesus comes back.
But what is God asking us to do in the meantime? What are we doing with our time, our hearts, our resources and our affections?
Although I know some of them are valid, my stomach sinks when I hear myself and my excuses of why I can't do much now.
"I have to finish my Spanish studies so I can be more effective in my ministry here in the long run."
"I have my hands full with leading the youth at my church, Bible studies, small groups, teaching English classes everyday."
"I'm just a single 24 year old American girl. What can I really do?"
I know if Jesus was here in the flesh, living with me, I would stop everything and just do what He did. Stop and listen to more people. Give them my time. Give them my food and my clothes. Stop thinking about myself so much and love people more.
I need His grace and Him to lead me everyday in what I should do. As I'm going about my busy activities of taking Spanish classes, teaching English, doing ministry and everything else, I want to be obedient to His voice and stop when He tells me to. Here we see poor and handicapped kids and people everyday begging for money. They're in the metros, at traffic lights, on the sidewalks, and all over the place. Now that's just part of the story. Then there's people just barely surviving, hopeless and trapped in drugs, alcohol, religion, abusive relationships, mindless sex, and pretty much any type of sin & pain you can think of.
Look around you. I know even in the pretty suburbs of Birmingham, Alabama there is pain all around. It might not be as obvious as it is here in Mexico City, but I know people desperately need hope and love.
Although I'm living the "missionary" life, I fail everyday. I can only pray that God allows my heart to grow and my hands to take action in loving these people. I pray He grows and moves you as well.
*my hope: taking the youth and teaching them how to love on & pray for people downtown and in our neighborhood. Pray for wisdom & guidance for me and Memo (my Mexican co-leader) in how to do this.
Thank you all for showing me and the Lord so much love in how you pray for me and support me. As I've told you before, I really could not be here without you guys. Thank and God bless you all!
